Wherever you met her for the first time in the bar, dating sites, or even in sex chat community. This time she’s agreed to hang out with you again. You're grabbing drinks at a bar near your place or hers.
You stroll in, fashionable, well-groomed, and like a total badass. You take a seat at the bar, and a few moments later, she walks in and joins you. It's go time. So, what do you do next?
The first thing you want to do is make physical contact as soon as possible. Stand up and give her a hug. This sets the tone for the rest of the date, and makes it easier to get physical later.
Make sure you sit side-by-side, preferably at the bar. If you sit across from her at a table, it's difficult to physically escalate and it can feel a little too much like a dinner date.
Once the two of you sit down, offer to buy the first drink. Say, "I'll get this round, you get the next." This is for two reasons: first, if you're taking a lot of girls on dates, you won't go broke buying all the drinks—and this is a fair and cool way to do it. Second, it’s a dick move to not at least offer to buy the first drink. After all, you invited her out.
Now, it's time for conversation. Follow what we discussed in chapter nine. Remember to listen and relate to her. You'll really want to focus on connecting with her here. So, start off with light, casual conversation and then go deeper.
Here are some things you can say to go deeper and connect:
- "Tell me about your biggest adventure."
- "How bad was your first kiss?"
- "What kind of things make you laugh the hardest?"
- "Tell me a hilarious growing up story."
- "Where have you traveled?"
- If you could wake up anywhere in the world tomorrow, where would it be?
- What's your dream job?
Bounce to a Different Venue
The conversation is flowing and you've had a drink or two. Now, it's time to keep the date moving forward. Hopefully you chose a bar with a few other bars in walking distance. Take the lead, and suggest to check out the next bar close by.
When you bounce around to a couple different venues on a date, she'll feel like you've been hanging out for longer than you actually have. You build trust and she feels more comfortable with you.
Make a Move
You should ALWAYS make a move on the first date. If you don't at least go for the kiss, her attraction for you will evaporate. If you're not sure whether a girl wants you to move things forward, just go for it. Shoot first, ask questions later.
Remember that girl Natalie? On our first date, I tried to kiss her THREE times at the bar. She denied me every time. But later on when we were alone, I went for the kiss again. This time, we made out for five minutes. Turns out she hated PDA (public displays of affection) which is why she didn't want to kiss me at the bar.
Trying and failing won't set you back. It just lets her know that you're a sexual man and you mean business.